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January 25, 2005

{     Interview : Big Pinky     }    

Big Pinky is the agent provocateur of television. He's taken it upon himself to hold up a dirty mirror to the TV, grabbing footage and re-contextualizing it into something he calls TV Carnage. Pinky truly is the Jive Bunny and the Master Mixers of the televised medium. (Specifically, he's that Jive Bunny song the cheerleaders at your Jr. High did all their routines to.) In his spare time he causes general mischief by documenting creeps who need to be documented.

Lindsey: I made a tape of people getting booed off the Apollo once and it took me 5 hours to get a good 15 minutes of footage, so I gave up. In the TV Carnage tapes you actually have little motifs within the mounds and mounds of other crap television. Casual Fridays must have taken you a ridiculous amount of time to do, right?

Big Pinky: The Apollo tape sounds awesome. I'd love to see that- it sounds excruciating and breathtakingly evil. But you are totally right about the amount of time it takes. It does border on insanity but I get so into it. I labor over cuts that no one would necessarily directly notice but at the same time I think they inevitably help the flow and people subconsciously appreciate it. The motifs are specific to human behavior and I get off on how contrived people's actions are on TV. From acclaimed film to an ad for used cars, NO ONE seems to know how humans really act. I love it. I know it's hard to draw from a life experience such as walking or breathing or having a "great time!" but I figure why don't they just give it a shot.

TV Carnage has the potential of coming off like a Dick Clark's Bloopers and Practical Jokes, but it's very thoughtfully done. You even take things that everyone's seen a 100 times, that are not necessarily funny, put them up on a pedestal and say "no really, check this shit out, you missed something". Do you have a plan going in to it or a certain theme you're going to use?

Again, it's based on "Holy Shit! Did that douche-bag just do that?! Did that gay fat guy and his straight wife actually think entering an erotic country and western dance contest was a good idea?" The themes kind of build themselves as much as I consciously arrange them. Casual Fridays is about the reward system people get conned into, like letting them wear their shitty kakis to work instead of their shitty discount suit. I think a lot of people have sooooooo given up on life, and by then this becomes something they actually look forward to. UGHHH! This girl I know was/is trapped at FED EX, and was always laboring to find reasons to like her job. One day her "Casual Fridays" privileges were revoked because some forms on her desk were in the wrong spot!!! HOLY SHIT!! Like she was working at Prison Inc. or something. A week later after being a bit pissed off about getting reprimanded, she concluded that she deserved the punishment and that she should have form 13345745 on the right side of her desk next to form 2398y3498y7, not the other way around. She learned her lesson and I learned mine. Never talk to her again. TV for me is like her. Everyone seems to just accept what is happening and suddenly the way they are being communicated to is just fine. It's pretty rad.

I can't watch Casual Fridays without all the television I watch the following week looking like TV Carnage (and without that hair dresser song sticking in my head). What have been some of the reactions that you've gotten from the tapes?

Various ones. "This is just shitty TV put together" is my favorite. A lot of other people say it's made EVERYTHING on TV look like Carnage which is the best thing ever. It's just a sensibility and once you get into it and share that sense of humor and share in the pleasure of checking out the all the other average robots you immediately feel like you've met another member of a family. It's like when you discover that you're not the only person who LOVES the smell of their own farts. It's like when my bud Gavin and I just sit in absolute bliss on a bus in Toronto or Brooklyn and listen to people speak. Usually it's just observationally based, like "Hey we're sitting on a bus" and then the person nods "Yeah, we are". Then we listened more and realized the average person speaks in movie posters and then we realized we could pin point which sitcom people learned the most from. So when someone is making a point or reacting to something we're like "Totally Full House reaction with a dash of NYPD Blues machismo." It is the bombnation.

I've read Anne Heche's (who's featured in the DVD) glowing review on the site. Has anyone else that has been featured in the videos ever contacted you after seeing them?

Good-old Anne was at a screening in a porn theatre in Toronto. Knowing that she was sitting in a sold out porn theatre inhaling warm bleach, cum and piss fumes made her even more of a crazy heroine than ever. I have gotten feedback through people on some of the wonderful subjects. Over all, it has been enjoyed. How can you argue with evidence like TV Carnage?

STAR FUCKER ALERT!!! NAME DROPPING ZONE - I've had people like David Cross, Davey Grohl, Johnny Knoxville, lovely Suicide Girls, and other pathetic losers tell me they love Carnage, which is alright.

Can you even sit down and watch TV anymore for fun or do you always feel like you're working? If so, what do you watch?

It all comes to me. I'm a divining rod for shitty TV, many have noted. But TV is becoming all TV Carnage so I've really got to search to out-do the past Carnage glory. So I'm always looking at TV that way. Watching TV any other way is a gateway drug to submission.

On there's a video of a guerilla-style Geraldo Rivera-esque interview you did, in short shorts, with some Nazis. This went down after you found a white power pamphlet in the street, put on your "whitest accent", and called them to see if you could come over. When you showed up and weren't white, there was some confusion, the obligatory 'go back to Africa', and Hennigan spit on you. Was that pretty much the gist of it or did anything else go down after they threw you out?

They followed me a bit, but the opportunity to have a camera focused while threatened with being shoved back up my mum's twat is a bit of a magic carpet ride. There's no course for that in University. They should be teaching that but they don't.

So, you've got your documentary on Strip Club DJs coming out soon on DVD. As a DJ in the film puts it, that lifestyle is "Eight hours (of) playing music, suggesting songs, dealing with girls, paying girls, dealing with the phone, dealing with customers, doing lights, and between it all, trying to do drugs, get your cock sucked, and keep the boss happy." Any good stories from the strip club DJ circuit?

No, none at all. YES!!!!!!!! GAAAAAADDDD! There were amazing conversations and lots of action! At one place I was called into the strip club's office by the managers. They were right off of Stereotype Inc.'s shelves. Rings on every finger, bad suits and an inability to understand what I wanted to shoot. Every time I'd say I wanted to interview the DJs, and if the girls want in on it, great. They would say "WHY THE DJS, THEY'RE BUMS!" I went through that exact conversation 3 times in a row with them. All the while, a dancer is trying on different outfits, stripping down to her dirty parts each time. She was like- "Nurse? No, not a nurse crowd. Domanatrix? Naaaah. Hmmm. Hooker? YESSS!"

I was just staring at my fucking camera under one of the guys arms asking my lord and savior "WHHHHYYYY!!!" FUCK!!!

Or when I saw a Chinese club-owner grinding his Italian loafer heel into Scott's face while he was on the ground, (Scott is the bald chatty DJ) due to an import/export supply-and-demand party-services dispute. Shit. There were tons of crazy moments. Some I did get and will include as extras when I put the DVD out this fall. I'm also going to get the best DJ in the film (Scott) to do the commentary with me. After the film he went into rehab and he is doing well- He is actually a really good writer.

Your next project is a documentary on guns, gun collectors, and pink guns for women, can you tell us some more about that?

It's a love story based on owner and a gun from a Canadian perspective and it will be shot in the States and Canada mostly. It is narrated by a chorus of children dressed as lawyers, guns, bullets and other cute adult things. If I get - NAY - when I get the film, it will have an actual budget. So if you know any crazy gun people on either side of the fence I want to know.

It sounds like you're really busy with other projects, any more TV Carnage tapes coming out soon?

Yeah. I'm combining 1 and 2, the ones with the nuns on the cover, into a single unholy presence. With commentary. Hopefully with special guests from the celebrity world of pain. I'm also simultaneously working on a completely new one, faster, stronger and funnier with an overwhelming presence of psychological cologne, which means I will be in a coma within a month.

It's called "A Sore for Sighted Eyes." Anyone who donates something wonderfully Carnage-worthy that ends up getting used gets a free Carnage DVD.

TV Carnage
1117 Queen St. West
#444, Station C
Toronto, Ontario
M6J 3P5

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