March 25, 2004

{ The Transformers Masterpiece Collection: Hasbro Optimus Prime 20th Anniversary Edition }

This bad boy is the Holy-fucking-Grail of old-school Transformers fans and hard-core toy collectors alike. I think it's fair to say that the Transformers line has never quite topped it's initial success and glory- forged by an extremely popular cartoon and a toy line that promised two kick-ass toys for the price of one. The king of toys back in those days, and certainly the most well-remembered and best-loved first-generation Transformer was the Autobot leader Optimus Prime. The name alone still sends a chill up my spine. Optimus Prime taught an entire generation of young men what responsibility was all about- and at a time when decent role-models were harder to come by than an honest politician, Prime was there to lead by example. Always willing to sacrifice, constantly putting himself in the path of danger and never giving up hope even in the bleakest moments, he was an inspiration to us all. Optimus Prime loved this planet and it's people as much as any of his Cybertronian brothers, and if you start to notice a few similarities between this guy and a certain Man of Steel (they both even sport the red and blue motif!), you're catching on to just how powerful an icon Optimus Prime has become for many of us. This toy is a fitting homage to the legend. Standing a foot tall in robot mode, Prime's vehicle mode is a fairly precise 1/24 scale. If the mere sight of this ultra-detailed representation of our hero alone isn't enough to induce a pants-shitting level of excitement, just wait until you lay eyes on his accessories. You want a precision-painted replica of Prime's Ion Blaster, the rifle he used to subdue many a Decepticon threat- you got it. Remember that one time Prime was duking it out with Megatron on top of the Hoover Dam, and they decided to get Medievel on each other's asses with some hand-held weaponry? Prime whipped out a blazing orange Energon Axe and chopped up some bad guy, and you can relive every moment with the faithfully reproduced translucent orange Energon Axe accessory, which can replace Prime's right-hand. Speaking of Megatron, you also get a scale replica of Mr. Decepticon himself in gun-form for Prime to hold. Did that ever happen in the cartoon? Who cares! The Megatron replica doesn't transform, but it can be broken down into it's various components- scope, shoulder stock, extended barrel and Walther P-38 pistol just like the old Megatron toy. Prime has pop-up communicators on both forearms and a button on his back that makes his mouthplate move like he's telling you to "Roll out!" Then there's the real dope shit- Prime's chest plate opens up to reveal a removable replica of the Autobot Matrix of Leadership, a spiritual warehouse of the souls and knowledge of each leader that has come before him. His vehicle mode is every bit as cool, even if the transformation to get him there is a bit involved. Real rubber tires and smooth rolling action, plus he's scaled to pair up with the new Alternators line of ultra-detailed Transformers currently hitting shelves. All this love comes with a pretty heavy price tag. Prime retails for $79.99, and you can find him for 75+ in a lot of online outlets and in retail stores like Toys 'R Us, though the sharks are in the water and many secondary markets are charging 100+, so buyer be warned! I've added a link below to bigbadtoystore.com, who is charging a respectable $69.99. Proprietor Joel is a real nice guy, and offers a veritable shitload of cool and hard to find toys, including some vintage pieces. If you're lucky enough to find one in your local Wal-Mart, and yes they have been popping up there, you can get one for just under $65.

» Buy Optimus Prime Masterpiece Edition at bigbadtoystore.com!

By Adam in Toys | Comments:

Comments

I think I dodged a $65 bullet a few minutes ago. First off: I was driving as drunk or drunker than I've ever driven before on my way home. There's a Wal-Mart that I know has a healthy stock of this figure in between work and where I'm living at the moment. I knew that the couch (which is the place to watch television or play video games) would be taken by sleeping persons tonight. I think we all know what happens when drunks cruise the Wal-Mart (*cough cough* Alias *cough cough*).

What I'm saying is: I managed to fight the temptation to waste my normally waking hours in front of the television at the Wal-Mart where Optimus would tempt me and kept on endangering myself and others by driving while very intoxicated.

Posted by: benjamin at March 26, 2004 6:20 AM

I hear they have a Minicon that doubles as a cock ring.

Posted by: Bryan L. at April 7, 2004 9:00 PM