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March 21, 2004

{     Wallpaper Murals     }    

Okay, I just looked at my watch and I think it's finally been long enough. I think that after many, many years of embarrassment, we've at last had enough time away from these bad motherfuckers, and thus I think it's finally okay for me to herald the return of the oh-so-cheesy, yet oh-so-rad classic: straight outta grandpa's den, it's the Wallpaper Mural! You heard it here first folks, I hereby declare that from now on, the only way your swank pad is gonna go past luke-warm on the hotass meter is if you break down and cover one of your precious few walls with one of these gigantic, near-life-size murals depicting your dream view. Whether it be a dense green forest, a ravishing Hawaiian waterfall, or one of the wide variety of forever loved beach views, it no longer matters how much crap you haul into your place from Urban Outfitters or how much you spend at Ikea, this year the word is you suck if you don't rock a full-wall sunset. TV is so 2003, it's time to turn off the tube and stare at the wall.

     » To see some example rooms, click here.
     » To see more options, go here.


That second link has some seriously fucked-up shit. I guarantee that if you were to put up one of their "Star Trek" murals, you'd definitely be going where no one has gone before. I was hoping they'd go the photo-realistic route, maybe pull some stills from the shows, (An old-school Enterprise orbiting Rigel-7 would have been nice) but what you get instead is something even the nerdiest of nerds would still deem nerdly. I swear it looks like they took markers to a fabric canvas! You need to see it to believe it, just watch out for the super-long page load times on that site- I think all this C-12 traffic is bogging them down!
I may end up ordering one of the outer space murals from the first site ( and just pasting a nice color copy of the Enterprise onto that shit. Or maybe I'll buy the "Storybook Nook" mural and glue some Smurfs on. Or maybe I'll just huff the glue and stare at my blank white wall and see what happens.

Posted by: Adam at March 22, 2004 2:41 PM
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