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December 12, 2003

{     Jesus Ashtray     }    

So, you've tried everything else, smoking ultra-lights just made you move up to 2 packs a day, hypnotism broke the zipper on your jeans, and you just can't afford the time off work for a coma, so just maybe the sad, teary, tortured face of Jesus might help you finally kick the Camels. Short of snake-handling, nothing else is hated in church more than a guy who sparks a smoke right after a good prayer. So if you want to make sure you can handle the next 4-hymn gospel block without making a run for the fire exit (meaning Hell), maybe this might do the trick: the lord himself in your ashtray, reminding you that "Jesus Hates It When You Smoke." Face it, nobody makes you feel guilty like Jesus, and for $12, at least you might only smoke 17 cigs a day instead of an even pack'a'20, right?

     » Salvation, this'a way!

Comments

Just in time for the holiday! What a great stocking stuffer...

Posted by: Greg Francis at December 16, 2003 3:49 AM

I think people should make MORE fun of Jesus.

Posted by: Skin Showsomeoff at December 19, 2003 8:29 AM
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